Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Musings

I went back to Michigan, my home state, about a month ago to get out of DC, let my bloodpressure get back to normal, and most importantly visit my family. I get home about 2-3 times a year which always includes Christmas, sometime in the summer or late summer and 1 other time somewhere in the middle to get my sanity back. I go there for vacation so I can sleep in, have my mom take care of me, read 3 months worth of People magazines, have breakfast with my nephew and, well, pretty much to do nothing. I try to make a date with my dad to go bowling and spend the night at our cottage but other than that it's just to get away from DC. Don't get me wrong--I love living here, but I also love going home to my family. My nephew is now 2.5 yrs old and THE best thing in the whole wide world, and Sister 1 is preggers again due in late January. I hate missing seeing Nephew grow up and all the cute things he does and how he sometimes terrorizes my sister. It's one thing to hear him say 'i love you' on the answering machine but to hear it in the morning when he wakes me up so he can have pancakes with Auntie Emmy....that's a heartbreaker.

That last time home I sat on the plane back to DC and thought if I would ever move back to Michigan and the answer is always a quick 'no'. Then a pause and the thought of 'well.....'. I can see myself going back because I want to be in my nephew's life but besides my family I don't know what else is there for me. I wonder what might be different if I hadn't moved East after I graduated. Would I still be doing marathons, ultra trail runs and triathlons? What job would I have and would like love or hate that? Would I have a house? Be married? Or would I constantly wonder what it would be like to get out of Michigan?

I have the 'I love you' messages saved on the answering machine, the long waits at Safeway to read the People magazines and there's always time to do nothing. And I can always go back. Just not right now.


Oh-oh you've just gotta hear this: Athlete: Hurricane